When Kevin and I were dating, which was a long time, everyone constantly questioned us about when we were going to get engaged. Then, we got engaged and people wanted to know immediately when the wedding was going to happen. The wedding took place and you would think people would be content with that, but 'no' because they wanted to know when we were going to start having children. One year after getting married, I got pregnant, and nine months later Alessia entered the world. So, now everyone is happy...right? Absolutely not! For months now people have been asking us when we are going to have another kid. I give up. I have determined that people are just never going to be content.
To be honest, some days I think one child is enough for us. I never wanted to have an only child, but I would be perfectly content if that was all we ever had. In the same respect, I am not saying that we won't have more kids.
Being a mother is hard work and I will admit that it is a lot harder than I expected. Alessia hasn't been a difficult child, but I wouldn't say she is an easy one. She has never been much of a crier...AMEN to that. She adjusted well to our hectic lifestyle (especially at the beginning of her life), she is an amazing eater, and she has never had attachment issues with anything (no pacifier, blankie, toy, bottle). On the other hand, she won't take a bottle, didn't sleep well until she was about 11 months old, doesn't like to nap, and still dislikes the car. Wonder if our second child has colic, never sleeps through the night, loves his/her pacifier, refuses to nurse, or is a picky eater?
While Kevin is a HUGE help when he is around, he works a lot and travels a great deal for his job (but because of that job, I am able to stay at home with her). Taking care of Alessia is left solely up to me when he is gone. We don't have family around for assistance and she doesn't go to daycare or a babysitters. We seriously spend every waking moment together...even when I'm using the bathroom or taking a shower. We have this unbelievable bond and I seriously am scared that I might not ever be able to have that with another child.
There are night when I go to bed thinking one may be enough. But then there are times when I think maybe it's time for #2. Only time will tell, but for now, I will laugh (and roll my eyes) every time someone asks when #2 is coming.
Oh I remember these feelings. Kelby and I had a bond like no other. He was my lil man. My best friend. My all. When I found out I was pregnant again I thought, "how could I ever love another baby as much as I do Kelby!?" I was sick my whole pregnancy due to my fears and over thinking. And then I had Kalli Kay. And guess what!? I instantly bonded with her. Not like my bond with Kelby. But it was just as strong. It was just as special... And you know what else!? Over the years the two of them have developed a bond that no one can replace... One that is so special I don't even understand. And this whole process was repeated when I became pregnant with baby number 3....
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